Change is a funny thing in my experience. Change is a wibbly, wobbly thing and not a linear progression and is terrifying and exciting in equal measure.
Back in 2013, I was 47, facing redundancy from the company I’d been a part of for nearly 21 years and I was scared shitless!
As if this wasn’t enough, my son was about to leave for uni and my daughter wouldn’t be far behind: I guess we could say that change was happening whether I liked it or not.
What surprised me the most was the mixture of feelings I experienced.
One minute the thought of reshaping my life was hugely thrilling and energising and the next, I just wanted to crawl under the duvet and stay there until it was safe to come out again.
There were tears, tantrums and tiaras and I’m ashamed to admit that I can’t have been much fun to live with as I worked things out back then.
Have you ever found yourself doubting your ability to embrace opportunities? A feeling that you’re not smart enough, thin enough or clever enough to handle the challenges that you might have to face? Well, that’s where I was back then.
I experienced a horrible sense that I was losing my identity as Mum, Training Manager and Business Coach and recognised that I was operating from a position of fear and self-doubt which slowly became my new norm.
I honestly can’t remember what made me start to look at things and realise that the only person who could make things work for me was me. The understanding that successful change only happens from the inside out and not the outside in crept up gradually. The realisation that I could choose how to feel and what to do was freeing and empowering – part of me wishes I’d got there earlier but everything happens when it’s supposed to, doesn’t it?
So, I started reading books, watching You Tube videos and attending workshops and training courses. Some of it was great, some of it was complete claptrap but, overall, this process of learning has led me to where I am now, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
I’ve learnt that, to get where I want to be in life, I must be able to embrace change, but also must be able to accept and adapt to situations as they evolve. Accept that there will be failures on the journey. There will be successes, there will be shifts and there will always be one or two surprises or things I didn’t plan for as well.
I realised one of the most powerful skills I need to cultivate is the ability to adapt to change and to be more accepting of it because, In the long-run, this will allow me to embrace success rather than being afraid of it.
So what’s different today?
Well, I finally like myself, feel fulfilled and am making a difference to the people I work with in a way I could never have imagined 6 years ago. I have a renewed sense of purpose and energy and have made better connections with the people and things around me. Procrastination and self-doubt are largely things of the past and I’m proud of the woman I’m becoming.
Let’s just say that, saying a great big, fat “Yes” to change was the best thing I ever did!
What could you say “yes” to right now?
What difference could it make if you decided to make that change?
What’s stopping you from changing?
What would help you make the change?
Don’t forget that you don’t have to do this alone, I certainly didn’t! Get in touch if you’d like to chat.